diff --git a/src/npc/descriptions/describePiercings.js b/src/npc/descriptions/describePiercings.js
index 23b7725c9d89f01767dd3a37d2d6b1b152c3e52b..695d8823c90f11b806613b5a2c110e5727fb92da 100644
--- a/src/npc/descriptions/describePiercings.js
+++ b/src/npc/descriptions/describePiercings.js
@@ -395,22 +395,22 @@ App.Desc.piercing = function(slave, surface) {
 						r.push(`Since ${he}'s wearing slutty bangles ${he} has a short length of light chain dangling from ${his} dickhead piercing; as ${he} moves it tugs lightly at ${his} cock.`);
 					}
 				}
-			} else if (slave.clit > 0) {
+			} else if (slave.vagina === -1) { // God help us, nulls.
 				if (slave.piercing.genitals.weight === 1) {
-					r.push(`${He} has a simple clitoral stud.`);
+					r.push(`${He} has a simple stud in the smooth ${slave.skin} skin above ${his} urethra.`);
 				} else if (slave.piercing.genitals.weight === 2) {
-					r.push(`${He} has a big ring in ${his} clit.`);
+					r.push(`${He} has a big ring in the smooth ${slave.skin} skin above ${his} urethra.`);
 					if (slave.clothes === "slutty jewelry") {
-						r.push(`Since ${he}'s wearing slutty bangles ${he} has a short length of light chain dangling from ${his} clit ring; it constantly stimulates ${his} pussylips.`);
+						r.push(`Since ${he}'s wearing slutty bangles ${he} has a short length of light chain dangling from the ring; it constantly stimulates what remains of ${his} sexual nerves.`);
 					}
 				}
-			} else { // God help us, nulls.
+			} else {
 				if (slave.piercing.genitals.weight === 1) {
-					r.push(`${He} has a simple stud in the smooth ${slave.skin} above ${his} urethra.`);
+					r.push(`${He} has a simple clitoral stud.`);
 				} else if (slave.piercing.genitals.weight === 2) {
-					r.push(`${He} has a big ring in the smooth ${slave.skin} above ${his} urethra.`);
+					r.push(`${He} has a big ring in ${his} clit.`);
 					if (slave.clothes === "slutty jewelry") {
-						r.push(`Since ${he}'s wearing slutty bangles ${he} has a short length of light chain dangling from the ring; it constantly stimulates what remains of ${his} sexual nerves.`);
+						r.push(`Since ${he}'s wearing slutty bangles ${he} has a short length of light chain dangling from ${his} clit ring; it constantly stimulates ${his} pussylips.`);
 					}
 				}
 			}