part one

src/events/scheduled/murderAttempt.js

@@ -36,7 +36,7 @@ App.Events.murderAttempt = function() {
 	function intro(fragment) {
 		const r = [];
 		r.push("As per routine, you are sifting through the messages your personal assistant has flagged as relevant from the mass that fills your inbox each day.");
-		r.push("One is a request by a company called \"" + companyName + "\" for a personal meeting to propose some kind of");
+		r.push(`One is a request from a company called ${companyName} for a personal meeting to propose some kind of`);
 		switch (variation) {
 			case "trade":
 				r.push("business venture.");
@@ -51,7 +51,7 @@ App.Events.murderAttempt = function() {
 				r.push("military endeavour.");
 				break;
 		}
-		r.push("Despite being incredibly vague about the details of said business venture they have references from multiple reputable businesses in the");
+		r.push("Despite being incredibly vague about the details of said business opportunity, they have references from multiple reputable businesses in the");
 		switch (variation) {
 			case "trade":
 				r.push("trading");
@@ -66,30 +66,30 @@ App.Events.murderAttempt = function() {
 				r.push("military");
 				break;
 		}
-		r.push("and slavery sectors, many of which are known for dealing in not so legal business regularly, making the vague details seem more like making sure not to leave any possible proofs of illegal ventures behind.");
+		r.push("and slavery sectors. Some of them are known for dealing in less than legal business regularly, so the lack of information may just be either an attempt to distance themselves from seedy dealings or something truley lucrative, if slightly dirty.");
 		App.Events.addParagraph(fragment, r);
 
 		let yesText, noText;
 		switch (variation) {
 			case "trade":
-				yesText = "New business is";
+				yesText = "New business is always good";
 				noText = "profitable business venture";
 				break;
 			case "slave":
-				yesText = "Unique slaves are";
+				yesText = "Unique slaves are always interesting";
 				noText = "special slave";
 				break;
 			case "drug":
-				yesText = "Special drugs you cannot buy are";
+				yesText = "Special drugs unavailable to the public are always interesting";
 				noText = "new drug";
 				break;
 			case "military":
-				yesText = "A profitable use for your mercenary troops is";
+				yesText = "A profitable use for your mercenary troops is always good";
 				noText = "profitable military venture";
 				break;
 		}
 		App.Events.addResponses(fragment, [
-			new App.Events.Result(`${yesText} always good, invite them to a private meeting.`, invite),
+			new App.Events.Result(`${yesText}; invite them to a private meeting.`, invite),
 			new App.Events.Result(`You are not going to waste your time on something as vague as a "${noText}".`, endEvent)
 		], "invite");
 	}